The Morning After
by MissHayleeBlack
Summary: Remus's thoughts as he wakes up the morning after a particularly rough full moon. Many of which involve his beloved boyfriend. One-shot...drabblish.


Consciousness slowly crept upon Remus like a lion would stalk a gazelle. The silence before the kill lurked menacingly. Anticipation rose in his stomach until the quick, graceful pounce. His entire body felt on fire, like a demon was devouring his body from the inside out. His muscles tensed and quivered and his breathing was bated. He ground his teeth painfully and clamped his eyes shut. A cough-like grunt came from his throat as the air was forced from his lungs. Tears rolled down his cheeks, falling into his facial wounds and snapping at the cuts with the pincers of an iron crab. His dry lips split. The blood dripped into his mouth. He wanted nothing more than to spit out the metallic taste. His finger nails dung into the thin hospital-wing mattress as his heels shoved against it. His back arched painfully. Then his eyes flew open; they were a glowing amber with dark brown rings framing his irises.

His muscles relaxed slowly and his eyes drifted shut again. Soon the blood stopped rushing in his ears, and he heard the gentle whispers someone was speaking in his ear. Slowly his gained consciousness of his senses. After taste and hearing came his sense of touch. He felt the soft air from the person's words on the shell of his ear. His grip tightened when he realize the person was holding his hand. Then he smelled the all too familiar scent: faint traces of a citrus cologne, having worn off from the sheer hours since it was applied; mud and grass and wet dog from a long night of romping in the woods with the friendly neighbor werewolf; and mint chewing gum that the owner liked to chew in attempt to get rid of morning breathe after spending all morning holding his boyfriend's hand. Said boyfriend had lain unresponsive in the hospital wing after casually morphing into a werewolf the night prior. Passed that scent was the normal smell of a warm lunch James and Peter would always bring them, the too clean smell of the hospital wing, fresh linen, and the faint smell of pain-killing potions.

Remus smiled softly despite his sore muscles. He opened his eyes again, this time actually seeing. His vision was blurry at first, and he had to blink away of the sleep from his eyes. His first sight was Sirius's exhausted, smiling face. Remus just took in his boyfriend as he wondered how he ever managed to be so lucky. Sirius's eyes were a dark, steely gray, but had a playful, mischievous light behind them at all times. His smile possessed white, straight teeth that celebrities would die for. It was too childlike and innocent, however, no matter how cruel the world had been to him. His smile would have been much brighter had his face not been so clear and pale. He has beautiful skin though. It had a nice red undertone yet his skin didn't look like he was plastered all the time. It just made him look incredibly healthy and virile (if you ignore the momentary dark circles under his eyes that would disappear with sleep). Remus adored Sirius's masculine features most. His jawline was strong, but not in a burly way. His shoulder muscles were well built as were all of them. (This confused Remus as Sirius is a very lazy person in general.) He had these high, prominent cheekbones though. They were elegant and aristocratic even. That along with his straight nose made Sirius looked like royalty.

Drawn out of his musing by Sirius's suddenly puzzled look, Remus coughed a bit and blinked hard to make it seem as if he had just been dazed.

"Hey you," Remus said hoarsely, his throat feeling raw.

"How are you doing?" Sirius asked softly. Remus smiled at the sound. His boyfriend's voice was always so deep and velvety. Sirius's eyes flashed with understanding upon seeing Remus grimace when opening his mouth to talk, and he helped Remus sit up. Once Lupin was propped up against the back of the bed, Sirius gave him some water to drink.

Remus downed it and the cool liquid soothed his throat. He licked his lips to medicate them as well before he attempted speaking again.

"Fantastic," He answered weakly. Sirius chuckled softly and ran a hand through the werewolf's sandy-blonde hair. Remus closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling much more than he cared to admit. These mornings after the full moon were always so different for him. It was one of the only times Sirius was what one would consider gentle and innocently affectionate. Remus wasn't used to the loving caresses and soft kisses. Usually everything was so heated about their relationship. These mornings though... they assured him that Sirius cared for more than his body. It warmed his heart and made the muscle flutter in his chest.

Sirius kissed Remus's temple softly and then his forehead. His thumb massaged slow circles into the back of Remus's hand. He would gaze with this soft, vulnerable look at his boyfriend. Remus knew everything Sirius wanted to say just by that look. _"I love you so much. I just don't know how to express myself. I'm just scared of feeling. I'd be lost without you. You are my soul mate." _Remus knew it, and Sirius never had to say a word. He would be patient. It didn't matter if Sirius ever actually spoke those three words to him. Just so long as they both knew their feelings for each other. Sirius needed to hear him say it though. He needed to be reassured because his childhood has scarred him. Remus knew this about him, yet Sirius has never spoken a word to suggest it.

"I know, Padfoot. I love you too," Remus murmured. Sirius squeezed his hand gratefully. Remus looked at Sirius, smiling softly. They stayed like that for several moments. They just enjoyed the other's presence and took comfort knowing they had made it another month.


End file.
